18

Our oldest son turns 18 in just a few days. In fact yesterday, February 21, was his due date...just 18 short years ago.   Our celebration is much different than most.  Ours comes with a bit of trepidation.  You see, March 3, 2016 marks the day that his birth mom has the legal right to contact him.  For the past 18 years, I have actually looked forward to the day when I could give him his box.  The box that I have been filling up with letters, cards and gifts from his birth mom.  My desire was to give it to him on his birthday, but I've been feeling the urgency to give it to him now.  Nailing him down is a problem though.  He is so busy with Basketball and living life as a Senior in High School.  I am going through all the emotions of a mom who's firstborn is going through their senior year.  The last first day of school, Senior night for Basketball.  His last home game.  And coming up, Senior Banquet and dance, Senior Exams, Senior Trip...... and then Graduation.  Lord help me through the next few months.

When did this little baby, become this man??

Why didn't time stand still? There are times when I am reduced to a puddle of tears.  I am so grateful for the wonderful gift that was given to us.  That God allowed me to become a mom.  That I was deemed worthy to be mom to this boy, this man...  My heart is overwhelmed.  I hope, that if he does choose to meet his birth family, that they will see that we did a good job raising him and that they made the right choice.  Because, I know they did...  I can't imagine NOT being his mom.

My heart bore witness with Hanna when she wept bitter tears for a child and again when she presented her firstborn to God.  

1 Samuel 1:27–28
"I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD."