Friday, September 25, 2009

My Thoughts on Adoption

Ok.. bear with me here.....

It seems to be the in thing to do here is to adopt orphans, and while I applaud this and I don't questions the motives of those doing it, I do have one little problem.... ME... yes, ME!

You see adoption for me was a way for us to be parents. The only way I was told. I love how God built our family and I wouldn't have it any other way! For 11+ years I have wanted to find a support group for parents of adopted children. Our church has one and to tell you the truth I am afraid to join it. Why? Because I can almost guarantee that the majority of people in the group are adopting not to become a parent but to add to their already existing family. And after talking to several of the other parents in the group who refer to their kids as "my natural kids" and "my adopted kids" well..... that just makes me ill... our kids are our kids, no titles, no description necessary, so labels, nothing... they are OUR KIDS!!

I want to find a group of people who wept for children, who waited for that one day to hold their first child in their arms. To be given a baby by a young girl who just couldn't be a mom at that point in her life. To know that one day your child may want to meet their birth-parents and to know that you have the information and you will give it to them.

I don't for an instant deny the love that these parents have for their children, no matter how they join their family. One of my dear friends is a foster mom and I know that she loves all 4 of her kids and hopes to one day add the 2 littles to her family forever!

I just want someone that I can share my feelings with. I guess in this day and age my situation is just different. It is hard to adopt an infant (although we were told that and here we adopted 3) and I do know that there are so many orphans in this world that need loving families.

So like I said, I know that my problem is ME, and how I will feel. Selfish I know...and I am working on it. Because maybe, just maybe there is another couple there that just wants to be parents, they just want ONE child..just ONE..and they think that nobody else feels their pain and hurt... and maybe, just maybe I can help.

Thank you God for my babies.... they mean so much to me!


1 comment:

Scrappin Memories said...

So create one!!! Rach, there are many families out there that come from the place you are at. I come from that place and my own parents come from that place, too. I will not forget the days of tears and I will never forget the day we became a family!! Those first moments are more special then anyone can every imagine. We have special gifts that God has given us - entrusted to us - our children. It is good to talk about the joys and remember the sorrows and the process to get where we are today (to being a family).

You can do this - maybe God is leading you to this place to start something special for families of infertility that have adopted. We are a breed of our own.

Hugs to you for saying what I have been thinking!