This morning I was thinking over something that happened last night. I was confronted of my failure and I reacted...not very nicely. I got angry. I wanted to push my mistake aside and start over. But I can't do that when people are involved. People that I love. My family.
Last night we went out for dinner. As we were sitting in the restaurant the weather outside was getting bad. The rain started pouring, the wind started blowing sideways (that isn't good) it started hailing and then everyone's phones started going off. Tornado warning. So being the sensible adults that we were, we all gathered by the windows and started taking pictures. The rain stopped. The wind died down, and we went back to our tables.
On the drive back, we saw what little damage there was and were thankful that we weren't hurt. It was a good night. Then it happened. I was reminded that sometimes I am not a nice person and I say and do things that hurt other people. I didn't sleep good because I knew that someone was disappointed in me and that they were hurt. I was hurt because I didn't do a good job telling them how I felt, and honestly, I didn't take their feelings into account. I was selfish. My reasons were selfish. I am selfish.
God promises to make things new. Sometimes that requires Him destroying the old and making it new. I need to be open to the breaking down of me. It hurts. It isn't fun. And sometimes I blame other people other than realizing that God is working on me. He doesn't throw me away and start over with a new person, hoping this time He gets it right. He works on me. He wants me to be the person that He knows I can be. Sometimes it hurts. But in the end, it is beautiful, and everyday He reminds me of His promise. He reminds me of His faithfulness.
I make mistakes...but God never does....
